BUF/CAR Game 4: Game Pucks & Schmucks

[eSabre]

Give me the best and worst of tonight's game.

[HURLS]

Best: Gerber

Worst: Anyone wearing #'s 5 thru 74.

[Ralonzo]

Schmuckedictorian: Jeff Jillson. Two lazy and/or brain-dead plays lead directly to goals. Thanks for the tease last game; you're the Nuke LaLouche of our defense corps.

Schmuck CumLaude: J.P. Dumont. Pulls a nifty move and gets stone cold robbed. Then proceeds to take a lazy penalty leading to a PP goal, and decides to quit trying. I guess in Quebec, guts is one of those things that only comes with Bernaise sauce.

Dean's List Schmuck (Dean Kennedy, that is): Rory Fitzpatick. Next time, don't even bother turning and skating for that dump in. Just go to the front of the net and lay down and see if the opponent who's going to be walking out of your corner with the puck regardless of what you do manages to trip over your supine self. I never cease to be amazed how he can take so damn long to make the wrong decision on a play.

Order of Schmuckus Meritus: Jay McKee. Too bad you can't win the Conn Smythe for goals you put into both nets.

Now it's time to present the consolation prizes:

A lovely gift certificate to the Phyllis Housley School Of Purse Swinging is presented to: Brianna Campbell, Alice Kotalik, Danielle Briere.

A pair of Hulk Hands that wouldn't have an adverse effect on your evidently absent offensive skills: Paul Gaustad, Taylor Pyatt, Jochen Hecht.

And of course, all Sabres participating in tonight's game receive a complementary case of:

[HURLS]

:rofl:

[Sabres244]

good old comic relief

[Scary Good]

Jillson and Janek SUCKED. Taylor Pyatt is borderline feces and Afinogenov is playing like Holzinger.